JohnxVriska OneShots
by GoldEdition
Summary: Nothing to see here, just a series of one shots for my favorite Homestuck pairing.
1. Chapter 1

**So yeah, I am a JohnxVriska sucker. ;-;**

**Anyway! Yeah, this will just be a series of one-shots between these two. Honestly, there is no set writing style, at least for me anyway. One chapter might be in third person, with the next in second, with the next in first, you never know.**

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><p>Part of him still couldn't believe that the plan had worked and that they all survived the scratch. Part of him was actually pretty sure that they were all going to be erased during the whole situation. However, Jade had apparently managed to avert all that at the last second and saved everyone from complete erasure, so that was pretty cool.<p>

Jade had also told him that he could send a brief message to the trolls before they ended up leaving for a total of three years. The idea of it stunned him that they would be gone, cut off from everyone for three years on a golden ship surrounded by green, so he wasted no time in getting the message written up and ready to go, not wasting any time to chew out Davesprite for completely defiling the faces of Willis and Affleck. Jade gave him a bucket to use; he crammed his letter in, and tossed it right at her, holding a look of amazement as it passed right through her, only remembering at the last second that trolls didn't like buckets.

He could also see the face of an absolutely horrified troll.

And that was that. He was now stuck with Jade, Davesprite, and the population of five planets for three years. He wouldn't even be able to meet the trolls and learn who was who for those three years.

Well, at least not until he heard a shriek from his sister, looked to see what was wrong, and promptly saw a lot of orange, and a pair of wings coming right at him. He had no time to prepare; all that could really happen was that the full force of whatever was tackling him knocking him to the ground, eliciting a grunt as all the air escaped from his lungs and his glasses flew off his head, landing a couple inches away. He was a bit out of it now.

"Hi Joooooooohn." A voice snapped him back to reality. John started fumbling around, trying to grab his glasses. While his hand was reaching and searching he could hear the voice speak again. "Recognize me?" Well, no, he couldn't exactly tell yet, he didn't have his glasses, though this was rather quickly rectified, having found them a few inches to the right of his head.

Placing them back on, he looked at the being that he now noticed was sitting on top of him in a rather compromising position. He could tell she was a troll, but that was it. So no, he didn't recognize her. Though, that was only temporary, their eyes met, and John was still a bit confused, but was drawn to her strange left eye, counting out seven pupils.

"_Seven?"_ John inquired to himself, before noting her other eye, it was normal. So she had eight pupils. Wait. Eight pupils. Eight. He looked back at the girl on top of him, it was clear she was waiting for an answer. Well, eight pupils total, and there was only one person that he knew that had any real affiliation with eight. Now her obsession with eight started to make a bit more sense.

"Vriska?" He managed to get out in a small whisper, sitting himself up a bit to stare at his patron troll on a more even level. It turned out he was correct though, as suddenly her face started to shine as a grin replaced her usual features from ear to ear. It wasn't one of those psycho grins he had always been told about, but this one seemed like something of genuine happiness. Wordlessly, she wrapped her arms around John's upper back and pulled him close, apparently that made her happy.

It was only then though that he realized his situation. There was an extraterrestrial girl sitting in his lip, surrounded by different creatures and friends and family. John wasn't sure if they were all watching or just chatting with each other and he really didn't want to know. No one had really pointed it out yet-

"Damn, Egbert, not even five minutes." John could hear Davesprite mock him.

Damn it, Davesprite.

John sent the sprite a look, and he swore he could see that grin of Vriska's spread even wider at Davesprite's teasing. Though thinking on it, the only reason he was thinking in these terms, and thinking on whether anyone was watching was simply because it was _Vriska_. Had it been someone, anyone else, it wouldn't have really bothered him. Vriska however, was… what was Vriska anyway? Was she a friend or a bit more? He had agreed to a date with her, so did that mean that they were more than friends? John was a little naïve on the subject.

Again, he was snapped back to reality by a little tug from Vriska. Did she want him to hug her back? He supposed he could go for it. He slowly raised his arms, wrapping them around his patron's troll's waist, oblivious to those around him for the moment.

"I told you I would talk to you again." Vriska whispered to the Heir of Breath

John simply smiled in response. That was true; he did hold her to what she said about that. And here she was, fulfilling that promise. "Yeah. Yeah you did, didn't you?" He muttered in response.

John felt Vriska pull away from him and lift herself up off of him, reaching down to grab his wrist and pull him to his feet. Taking a moment to look, John realized that no, not a lot of people were looking at him. Jade and Davesprite were, along with a few others, but they were far from the center of attention. Though that didn't mean there weren't questions.

The two turned to face the others, and it was actually Jade that spoke up first. "Wow John, is this a friend of yours?" She asked in an innocent manner, flashing a smile. Though John could see it in her eyes, she was curious about what was going on, and was probably holding back an urge to tease him on this. Dave had rubbed off on her, he was starting to assume.

John turned to Vriska for a moment, and then looked back. "Yeah actually. This is Vriska Serket. She's the troll that helped me reach God tier." This seemed to satisfy Jade, for now. John could still see a smirk on Davesprite's features though. It seemed that he probably wanted to say something, John would have to act fast in order to keep that from happening.

"So where will Vriska be staying?" John immediately spoke up.

Jade looked perplexed for a moment. "Well, while I'd have no problem with her staying with me. I'm not sure if I could do it for three years…" She sheepishly admitted, casting her gaze away from her brother.

"Three what?" Vriska interrupted, "How long is that?"

John paused for a moment. "Years. They're our versions of your sweeps, I guess?" Truth be told, John wasn't really sure how well a sweep translated to a year. She had said she was six, so he knew that a sweep was considered different than a year, at least he thought so. He wasn't really on top of the whole troll biology thing.

That didn't stop Vriska from freezing though and her face from falling. She also started looking around her, as if trying to find a way to get back, which was true. She did _not_ want to be stuck with everyone here for three sweeps, or however long years happened to be. She could bear it if she were stuck with just John. In fact, that sounded fairly pleasant. But not three years with everyone else.

"I'm sorry, but there's no way back, the others have probably already left." Jade shrugged apologetically.

That wasn't what Vriska wanted to hear. It confirmed that yes; she was now stuck with all these creatures for three years. So she would have to find something to do in the meantime in order to pass the time. She turned her attention back to John, who was looking back at her, a little confused, and maybe a bit concerned. The Scorpio grinned as an idea formulated in her head. Reaching over, she gripped John's wrist.

"Ow!" John ended up whining. She had a really strong grip. "Vriska, where are we going? I haven't introduced the others to you. Why are you pulling so hard, Vriska? It kind of hurts." He kept on complaining.

"Hush. We're going to your room." Vriska countered his whining. Of course, it hadn't occurred to her that he hadn't really had a chance to pick out his room. She wouldn't have cared about it either. If she was going to be stuck here for three years, she wanted to be stuck with someone that she would actually enjoy being around, and if that meant taking a little extra time to pick out a room with him, then well that meant more time, right?

With her mind made up, she started pulling John along with her off the deck and into the interior, wading through the crowd that had amassed due to Jade moving everyone off of the planets bit by bit. Vriska could still hear John complaining though at this point they seemed to be more halfhearted objections, which Vriska for the most part ignored. Really, if she had to deal with that for three years well…

"_Well maybe it wouldn't be so bad." _Vriska thought to herself as a smile formed themselves on her lips. Not a cocky smirk, or a grin, but a genuine smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**.w. So um, yes, here is another one.**

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><p>Finally, tonight was his big night; this was something that John couldn't even afford to muck up. It was a matter of life or death, as if he screwed up, he would surely be killed! Or, at least get a stern talking to from Jade later on while Davesprite made fun of him. And of course, Nannasprite would make a bunch of baked goods to try and cheer him up.<p>

Right, so life and death situation seemed to be fairly accurate.

To sum up the situation, this was the day that John had his big date with a certain Vriska. Or was it night? Honestly, he didn't even know anymore. Ever since they had gotten stuck in this green spaceland, he had really lost track of time. He could probably ask someone for the time, but really, now was not the ideal moment to do so; he really didn't want to veer off course, especially not now.

That was because right now, he was walking down a golden hallway side by side with his date towards the common room, where there was a TV that he could use. At least one that was close to a theater screen. Seriously, he wanted this to be just right; he didn't want this to end up getting screwed over. Though, it kind of already did. He didn't have access to his Nick Cage movies. That was just a bit depressing, so he had to make do with something else.

Star Wars, namely. John had all six of the movies, and seeing as they were all flying through space, that they would be fitting for their current predicament. Vriska had agreed, and that was the beginning of their date. It'd take a while, but John was prepared to go through with all the hours of movies. He'd done it before. It was different this time, though; he had Vriska to watch it with. And he would make sure to be a good date about it.

And he intended to prove that. Standing upright, John swallowed his anxiety, his eyes going wide and staring straight ahead. He shifted his movie bundle under his left arm and slowly, reached his now free hand to take hold of Vriska's. He didn't feel her fight it. In fact, he felt her hand wrap around his in response. That made him rather happy, so at least he did something right.

John immediately felt a like squeeze from Vriska though, before she leaned over, her lips just a few inches away from his ear. "Relaaaaaaaax. Don't get yourself so worked up. It's just you, and me. Got it?" She could apparently feel how tense he was, and how hard he was trying. That was rather sweet, she was trying to ease his worries.

"R-Right." John responded, a blush coming straight to his cheeks. He would try to follow that, but truth be told he was just too nervous. "I've… I've never been on a date before." He conceded to Vriska, who gave him a smile. She was really trying.

"Don't worry. You're doing fine."

John did try to keep those words in his mind, and managed to succeed somewhat as they entered the common room. The place was deserted at the moment, but had a nice large couch with a table in front of it and a nice large TV to compliment it and of course, it was surrounded by gold. Gold everywhere. It could get just a little bit blinding at times.

Vriska however, didn't seem to mind all that much. She let go of her date's hand took her place on the couch. John couldn't help but smile just a little bit at this, so he did what any attentive date would do; he placed the DVDs down on the table, taking the box of the Phantom Menace and popping it open. He took a few steps over to the DVD player under the TV, and placing the disc inside the tray, closed it and returned to take a seat next to his patron troll. No popcorn, just him and Vriska.

The usual warnings about counterfeiting or copyright or whatever preceded everything. John had no idea what they said; he never really bothered to read that. Rather, he just got to the DVD menu and pressed play.

The ever familiar blue tinted phrase faded in; _A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…_

This was followed by the famous trumpet blare, which even now, caused John to jump a little. It was always so loud, and after such a quiet opening. He wasn't the only one, Vriska ended up flinching too. The words of the franchise suddenly appeared, fading into the distance. John had a rather good feeling about all of this.

"Oh no. Oh fuck no."

Well, at least he did. John turned to look behind the couch to see a floating orange sprite, his expression, despite his choice of words, being one of indifference. First of all, John didn't want anyone coming in like this. This was a date, just between him and Vriska. Second of all, who did Davesprite think he was, mocking one of the crowning achievements of the film industry?

"It's a good movie, Dave! … Davesprite?" John still wasn't really sure what to call the sprite after all this time. He was a sprite now, and a future incarnation, but he was still Dave. "And what do you know about Star Wars?" John gave him a look that was expecting an explanation, some sort of justification for Davesprite mocking these movies.

"Bro would make me watch these all the time. I've seen every single one. He wouldn't shut up about how that little green puppet-"

"Yoda." John interrupted to correct him.

"-was a masterful rendition of puppetry, and that it deserved an award." Davesprite didn't even miss a beat.

Vriska however, was smirking a bit. She found it rather funny just how bothered John could get if someone started taking potshots at his favorite movies. Well, funny and a little adorable. But, she figured that she would stay out of it, let them argue over it for now. She kept an eye on the TV though; she wouldn't let them cause her to miss something.

Though it seemed Davesprite wasn't going to fight about it. "Anyway, Egderp, if you want to ruin your first date like this, I won't stop you." He gave the Heir of Breath some parting words before leaving the vicinity. John opened up to try and sputter something out, but nothing came, and his cheeks ended up flushing in embarrassment, and the fact that Davesprite seemed to have figured out what was already going on.

When John turned back, he noticed that they were already a few minutes in. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were already maneuvering through the Trade Federation capital ship, destroying any droids that dared to even give them the slightest bit of harassment.

It was about halfway through the movie that he felt some pressure against him. He looked over to see Vriska leaning up against him. John was a bit surprised; he never really took Vriska as the cuddly kind of person. Of course, he wouldn't really stop her. He wasn't sure what to say, but he did like this, and it did kind of mean he was doing something right. So, his face heating up again, he wrapped an arm around Vriska's shoulder and let the marathon progress, only stopping to switch to the next movie in line.

There were times when Vriska would ask a question, and John would do his best to answer without spoiling something. Though she didn't do it that much, which he was thankful for. He really didn't like it when people would not stop talking during a movie. He could however, notice her visibly tense up when he saw Count Dooku sever Anakin's arm and shove him away. He gave her shoulder a light squeeze.

Most of the movies were rather uneventful in getting a reaction out of Vriska, save for a couple events. She burst out laughing at the end of the third movie, when Darth Vader cried out with a dramatic no. She could hear John grumbling something about Han shooting first when she saw the rugged space captain kill the bugman in self-defense. At this point though, she was starting to get tired. They had been watching these movies for hours. But, if she was going to sleep, then she would at least let him know it was a job well done on his part.

Finally, her body was starting to give out during the fifth movie. It seemed that she probably wouldn't make it through the whole thing. Pity. Vriska looked over to John; she could see that behind those glasses that he was starting to give out too. Well, she probably didn't have all that much time for this. And maybe her fatigue was clouding her judgment. Or perhaps it was the opposite. It was subtle, but she noticed it; she was just a bit more… calm, when she was around John. She hadn't really been all that active during this marathon, instead having been rather content to enjoy being in his grasp. Despite this, she poked John softly in the cheek to catch his attention.

It worked; he slowly turned his gaze to her. She could see the look in his eyes, he was tired, and he wouldn't last much longer. That was fine. She didn't need him to be fully alert for this. The Scorpio leaned over to John, closing the distance. Blue lips met pink in a soft, gentle, and swift peck on the lips. It wasn't drawn out or long, she pulled away a couple seconds later.

John however, had a burst of energy from this. He hadn't registered her closing in at first; his mind wasn't working fast enough for that. But the moment their lips made contact, his brain started working at an accelerated pace. By the time he had fully processed everything, she had pulled away, leaving a stunned and blushing John. "Vriska, I, uh… what-" Vriska placed finger was placed against his lips for a second, a silent motion for him to be quiet, ending his stammering words before they could really get anywhere. Vriska just leaned against him once again, though she did find the flabbergasted John to be dorky, and admittedly cute.

He got the hint, and shut up. However, as the fifth movie ended, he separated one last time to put in the Return of the Jedi before sitting himself back down. He was sure he could make it through the last movie, Vriska, he wasn't so sure. He wouldn't force her to stay awake though. If she was tired, then she should sleep.

Still, he would make sure she was comfortable. The hand that had wrapped itself around his favorite troll moved, placing a few fingers on the base of one of Vriska's horns, rubbing them in a gentle manner. He wasn't really sure what this would do, to be honest, but he'd find out.

It turned out to be a rather good thing. A warming, relaxing sensation filled Vriska. She knew what he was doing and that just wasn't fair. This would normally be something that would immediately relax her in any other scenario, but combined with her fatigue, she wouldn't last like this. It seemed that was all too true, as only a few minutes later, barely into the beginning of the last movie, Vriska surrendered herself to slumber. She smiled as her lasts thoughts were that if this is how humans spent their time with their dates, then perhaps it was something she could get used to.

As for John, he was fighting to stay awake; he had managed to stick it out through the movies, and had thus far, just now made it to the climactic scene of the movie. Vader had turned away from the Dark Side and chucked the Emperor into the inner workings of the Death Star. He would only last just a bit longer through sheer willpower alone, giving up the fight just as the credits started rolling after the celebration on Endor, falling asleep just a few minutes later.

With John no longer keeping himself upright, he ended up slumping down and lying on the couch, causing Vriska, who had fallen asleep using John as a nice and dorky pillow, to follow suit, landing right on top of him. There they remained for the rest of the night, or was it day? No one really bothered to wake them up as they passed by and saw them.

Though it didn't stop one ghostly nanna from approaching the two, and with her one arm, laying a blanket on them with a smile.


	3. Chapter 3

**This one is told a lot from Jade's perspective. orz I should really stop involving everyone else in these things.**

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><p>It had been a long day for one Jade Harley, so when her brother had asked her if she was up for some Ghostbusters, she almost immediately said yes. Today had been exhausting for the Witch of Space, so she needed to spend some time with her brother. Even if he could be a complete ass when it came to Ghostbusters. The Heir of Breath had in the past, given her so much grief for giving her avatar a fox's head, calling it the "shittiest ghost buster he had ever seen".<p>

**EB: vriska should be joining us too.**

**GG: :D**

Jade was rather excited. It would be nice to have another person that she could actually talk to on her team. Davesprite was always enjoyable to chat with, but he was on the other team every single time they played, so John wouldn't let her tell him what strategies that had been planned. And what with John being a Ghostbusters know it all, he could be just a little bit grating to play with. It was nice to have someone else that pretty much knew nothing about the series.

**AG: Ok8y, I'm ready! ::::D**

**EB: oh wow, you look fantastic!**

**AG: I knoooooooow!**

Jade turned her avatar to face the newly arrived Vriska, to see just how she designed her character. What she saw caught her off guard.

Ashen skin, horns, a large blue overcoat, a sword strapped to her waist, and a _hook hand?_ And John was _praising this? _Vriska had just made Mindfang! Oh yes, Jade had seen Mindfang before. Vriska was more than happy to show off that outfit of hers, so she had seen it plenty of times. But the fact that John was actually ok with this. Oh, she needed to have a word with him, just so he could know just how irritated she happened to be at the moment.

**GG: ... what the fuck john**

**EB: what?**

**GG: dont "what" me!**

**GG: you gave me so much shit for my fox**

**GG: and then youre perfectly ok with your GIRLFRIEND making a PIRATE?**

**GG: bullshit**

**EB: i'll have you know that i find her design to be very fitting.**

**GG: she has a hook hand!**

**GG: she is a horned, grey skinned, blue overcoat wearing troll with a hook hand!**

**AG: M8y8e we're going after a ghost ship? ::::)**

**EB: yeah jade, did you think of that?**

**GG: UGH!**

Jade's hands came to her head in a double combo; this was just so completely infuriating. John was more than willing to give her trouble whenever she didn't act like a regular ghost buster, but when Vriska went and made her little Mary Sue, John was perfectly on board with letting her run rampant. So it looked like that meant they were going to be looking for a ghost ship or something?

Well, she supposed that if Vriska wanted to, then they might as well. She was new to the game after all. Plus, she didn't have any personal feelings against Vriska. She could be abrasive at times when John wasn't around, but she didn't seem malevolent. Though when John was around, she was much nicer. Some people, Davesprite specifically, thought it was a two face thing, but Jade could see it for what it was; John really did calm the girl down. It was actually really sweet.

So throughout their journey, she just mostly stayed a bit back and let John and Vriska spend some time together. They avoided the salamanders and crocodiles and God knows what else Jade brought onboard the warship, but it was overall adorable just to see the two interact. They would exchange jokes, witty banter, and a few 33333333 symbols here and there. It made Jade smile to see her brother so… happy. After everything they had been through in SBURB, he definitely deserved it.

At least they were happy right up until they found a fabled ghost ship. Vriska was all too overjoyed to find one and immediately rushed onboard. John ran after her, calling her name, while Jade just quietly followed along. Inside, they were accosted by a ghost pirate, a boss, Jade assumed, because it was currently beating the tar out of all of them.

John was however, in strategy mode. Jade hated it when John was in strategy mode, at least for this game. When John was in strategy mode here, he became a jerk. He started barking orders, getting annoyed at the slightest mishap, and just overall being insufferable. Vriska didn't seem to have much trouble with following his orders though. She was a natural at these kind of games it seemed, as she had picked up in a couple hours what took Jade a few days to adapt to.

Still didn't keep John from being a prick and it was wearing on Jade's last nerves.

It didn't help either that this boss was currently making a mockery of them all; John had ample healing items for everyone to keep them from dying, which was a lot. This guy was really hitting them for most of their health bar. Their streams did very little against this menace, and someone, a certain troll was getting aggravated.

**AG: UUUUUUUUGH. TH8S IS 8ULLSH8T. WHY W8N'T IT D8E!**

**EB: you don't kill a ghost, vriska, you imprison it.**

**AG: 8LUH, WHAT8VER!**

**GG: …**

Jade _really _hated it when John got like this. She could feel a little desire for revenge growing in her. Perhaps when John was around Vriska, some of Vriska's deviousness went to stay with Jade for a bit? She looked at Vriska's avatar on the screen, a devilish grin appearing on the Witch's lips. Right, she would have to take advantage of Vriska for a moment. _"Sorry." _She mentally apologized to the Thief before aiming her stream back at the ghost. But she knew what to do.

The one thing John told her to never do.

**GG: vriska, you see my stream?**

**GG: cross your stream with mine**

**EB: wait, huh?**

**AG: Will th8t kill it?**

**GG: it should**

**EB: no. no. we don't cross the streams!**

**AG: Ok8y. One moment.**

Jade couldn't help but snicker as Vriska's avatar moved over to hers, and aimed her stream right at Jade's. She could see in the little chatbox to the side that John was not happy about this. By not happy it is meant, of course, that the entirety of the chatbox was filled with deep blue text, screaming a combination of demands, curse words, and gibberish.

Her plan worked. The streams crossed, she could see the particles crackling and could see her avatar stressing as the flow of energy bombarded them all. Finally, it became too much, and a large explosion erupted throughout the area.

**EB: AAAAAAAA**

**GG: :D**

When the smoke cleared, the tactic did actually work. The ghost was down, but so was the team. John, Jade, and Vriska's characters were all on the ground, stone dead. It had been a flawless party wipe. Jade smiled again, oh yes, she felt rather satisfied with this. Jade reminded herself that she would have to make a note to make it up to Vriska later for using her like that. John however, got what he deserved.

In another room though, away from Jade, a Thief of Light was infuriated, with her Heir of Breath trying desperately to calm her down. Vriska swore left and right, screamed at nothing in particular, and vowed vengeance on poor Miss Harley for getting her killed. John honestly did not know what had gotten into her, it was just a game. Yes, it sucked that Jade got them all killed, but it was nothing worth starting a war over. He wondered what made it so horrifying, so he asked.

All he got was an enraged scream.

Though shortly after, Vriska did manage to tell him what it was; Mindfang never died. That wasn't a figure of speech, as John first thought. Apparently, that was the very first death that Mindfang had ever been handed. Considering how long Vriska had been playing as the character throughout her life, that was quite an accomplishment, at least he thought. So he supposed he could understand her being pissed, but he couldn't have her going after Jade.

John slowly inched over to her, and wrapped his arms around his troll's waist. He had one thing that could possibly soothe her. "Well, Vriska, I doubt she did it out of any real hard feelings." That was a lie. Jade knew not to cross the streams. Ever. It was a white lie though. "But, I can understand why she did it." He tried to salvage the situation. In response, Vriska shot him a glare, just practically daring him to actually give a good reason. He could tell though, she was slowly coming down from her tirade earlier. This was working; he just hoped he could soothe her.

"In the movie, they had to cross streams in order to banish Gozer back through the gateway it came through. Gozer was a really powerful ghost that they couldn't beat as they were, so they had to resort to a desperation tactic." John played his ace. He just hoped that Vriska would accept it. He was telling the truth, but he was worried that it wouldn't be good enough for Vriska.

"… So she was using a last resort, and it just didn't work out for us." She grumbled, a bit calmer than before. Yeah, she supposed she could see the logic behind that.

"Exactly!" John beamed at her. It looked like it was working, it looked like that she would actually calm down.

And he was right. Vriska in response just leaned into her Heir and made herself comfortable. "I'm still not happy about her getting us killed." John grimaced for a moment, had he messed up? Or was it simply not enough? "But I suppose she had a good reason for it. I gueeeeeeeess I can forgive her." She remarked, rolling her eyes in a playful manner. She was down from her rage. That was good enough for John.

John then felt a hand behind his head, pushing him downwards towards Vriska. The Scorpio turned her head to John and gave him a fanged smile. "But only because she's _your_ sister." She remarked, giving John a kiss on the cheek, leaving behind only a small blue imprint of a pair of lips, causing John's face to flush.

John cleared his throat. "S-So do you want to try again?"

The troll just snuggled up against him and let herself relax. "Maybe later," was her only response.

As of now, she was just content to be where she was.


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay. I tried to keep it to just John and Vriska this time. orz**

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><p>A year and a half had passed ever since they started on their big journey. They were halfway through this whole thing. Vriska had been with the few humans and the other natives for a whole year and a half. It really didn't bother her all that much. If she wasn't out cold and having nightmares, then she probably spent most of her time with John. Considering that the other humans, or former humans, taking Davesprite into consideration, could be rather insufferable at times, she preferred to stay with people who weren't insufferable. Jade did mean well though.<p>

But for now, Vriska wanted to be alone. No, nothing had happened, but rather, she just wanted to spend a little time alone. So she slipped away from everyone, went out onto the deck of the warship, and just took a seat, watching the green speed by them all. To be frank, this was terrible scenery. Just terrible.

And despite what she was aiming for, it didn't keep an Heir of Breath from finding her.

John stepped outsde onto the deck. He had been looking for Vriska. He hadn't found her anywhere inside the ship, and it took Jade pointing him outside to find her. Sure enough, he saw her sitting there, just watching the scenery.

John actually found that surprising. He had never really figured Vriska for the type of person to actually be content to sit around and do nothing. Watch movies, sure, at least she had something. Plus she liked to get close with him, but he never really took her for the type to simply sit around and do absolutely nothing at times. Was something wrong? He had wanted to talk to her about something, but would this be a bad time?

Vriska looked behind her, noticing the blue windsock. She immediately knew who it was. Her lips twitched upward. "Hey." She wanted to be alone right now, but she figured that if she had to have company, she would much rather have it be John than anyone else on this ship.

"Hi." He responded back, moving over to the troll and taking a seat. "Is everything ok?" He gave her a genuinely concerned look.

Damn he could be so sweet. It had taken over half a sweep for her to get used to things like this. "Yeah, everything's fine." Vriska was glad that there wasn't really anything wrong. It was moments like this and just small things like that from John that would always sneak past any defenses she had put up. She placed a hand down beside her and patted the floor a couple times, an invitation for John to come sit with her. The Heir of Breath accepted the invitation, taking his place beside the troll.

The two just sat together in silence for a little bit. Vriska made an insulting remark about the scenery around them, prompting a laugh from John. Though John had come out here for a reason. He wanted to ask, and figured that now would be the best time to do so. He turned to face Vriska, ready.

"What… what am I to you?" He did his best to make sure that he didn't come across as angry. He really wasn't angry with Vriska on anything, he was just curious. Troll romance could be so different from human romance that he wanted to know where he stood with her. Right now, they were really good friends, as they had never agreed to actually get together or make things public. This was so awkward. John had never really had these kinds of discussions before. It seemed like one of those typical "We need to talk about us" conversations that he had seen in so many of his movies.

As he probably should have guessed, Vriska turned to give him a rather quizzical look, as if he had asked something completely stupid, which, upon retrospect, John decided that he probably did say something rather stupid.

"You're my Matesprit, John." Well, that was rather easily taken care of. So apparently John was her Matesprit. It brought a wave of relief over the ectobiologist, at least right up until he realized that he wasn't entirely sure what a Matesprit was. Vriska had explained the quadrants once before to him, but the explanation was incredibly confusing. At least it was for him, and he just started tuning out the whole thing.

Vriska's face fell immediately after, and turned to John. "Are you saying you don't want to be my Matesprit?" She had a look of concern on her face. John's mouth opened in surprise. No, that wasn't it at all! At least he thought that wasn't it. It really depended on what a Matesprit was. He wanted to say it was like being boyfriend and girlfriend. At least he hoped so, as it was the only thing he could assume by her getting like this.

The Heir of Breath threw his hands up in defense. "No! I do! I do want to be your Matesprit, Vriska! I think."

"You think?"

"Well it's just uh…" John twiddled his thumbs, trying to get himself out of this situation. If he could say one thing about Vriska, she kept him on his toes. Vriska raised an eyebrow at him, obviously getting impatient. She was expecting an answer. Well, he supposed that all he could really do is just tell her the truth. "I'm just not sure… quadrants and all…" John trailed off. He was unsure of how to work this.

Vriska however, seemed to get what he was saying. She rested her head in the palm of her hands, and though muffled, he could barely make out what he assumed to be an Alternian curse word. She raised her head out of her grasp, staring John's blue eyes dead on with her own eight pupils. "A Matesprit is someone in the flushed quadrant. Red feelings. Based mostly on pity." Vriska summed up rather quickly. John only let out a nervous giggle in response. What kind of guy giggled?

"Do I need to explain the quadrants again, John?"

John could just feel the annoyance dripping in her voice. "No no, I think this is the only one I'm relevant to." John tried to get himself out of another explanation. When she did explain it last time, it took hours for her to get finished. That was something that he didn't want to have to give up again. "Which is what I was thinking what it was, so you're right, I am your Matesprit." John beamed over at her.

"Then why the question?"

Oh, right. John had actually forgotten the original reason that he had brought this whole thing up with her. His overbite gently bit into his bottom lip. His mind flashed back throughout the previous year and a half, through all their moments of intimacy, their kissing, and their cuddling. Never once had she actually said "I love you" or anything to that effect. "Well…" He looked away, "It's just that with everything we've done together, we've just never really talked about where we're at, and I just wanted to know if I was more than… you know..."

Vriska's lips curved into a frown, and her eyes narrowed at her Matesprit. "So you thought I was using you this entire time?"

John's blood ran cold at this. In a way, he thought she was. But there was a part of him that just wasn't a fan of how casual it was. He really didn't like how they just did these things when there was no clear bond. Maybe there was a part that felt like he was being used, but thinking on it, it seemed to be more like he just didn't like the fact that they weren't being official about it. Working up the courage, he responded. "W-Well, I think it's more that I'd just… you know, like to hear that we're Matesprits…" He answered softly and nervously. Oh sure, he was teased relentlessly about Vriska being his girlfriend, but he had never really been bothered. He figured it was teasing and just let it roll off his back.

While John was expecting something harsh from Vriska, instead, she just started laughing at him. The truth was, she actually found that somewhat hilarious. On Alternia, there was no real need to publicly announce when someone had taken a quadrant. It just sort of happened, and if the trolls had any sense of observation, they could easily pick up when something had developed between two certain trolls. She didn't blurt out their status simply because she felt it pointless to do so. The troll grinned mischievously, reaching out and pinching John's cheeks with her fingers. "You are such a doofus!"

John protested to this, swatting her hands away from him, frantically flailing. "I am not!"

"Doooooooofus!" More pinching.

The Heir of Breath once again swatted her away, this time keeping an eye out for anymore cheek pinching. "So does this mean we're official? Boyfriend and girlfriend or Matesprits?"

Rolling her eyes, Vriska gave an amused smile. "Yes, Joooooooohn, if it makes you so happy, I'll 'make things official.'" She still found it odd that she was being asked to be so public about this. She thought it was fine as it was. But, it clearly was something that John wanted, and it obviously made him happy, so she figured that if it did that, then she would agree to something that she assumed, was trivial.

It worked though. John's face turned beet red, but he immediately beamed a smile that just caused Vriska to inwardly melt. It was just little things like that that made what she did worth it. Little things like that that made her think that deep down, despite all the horrific things she did in her past, that maybe someone like her could have something resembling a happy life, even if it was something considered something outside the norms for troll society.

"So what do you want to do now?" John interrupted her from her reveries. He was still flushing, but she could tell that he had regained his composure. At least he wasn't completely stuttering.

At first, Vriska said nothing, instead gripping John's shirt and pulled him over to her side, giving his lips a quick kiss. "Let's just stay here for now." She suggested, wrapping an arm around John. John in turn, wrapped an arm around the troll, snuggling up close to her as they watched the continuous green speed by them.

"Vriska?"

"Yeeeeeeees?" Vriska playfully answered.

"… I love you."

Vriska thought for a moment. She really didn't quite get the whole love thing yet. Matesprits were based on pity. So it was a bit unusual to her to say she loved John, but…

"… I love you too, John." At the same time, it felt so fitting.


	5. Chapter 5

**Remember how I said I'd try not to involve others in this? Turns out I failed. Dear God.**

* * *

><p>"V-V-Vriska!" A panicked John Egbert called out the name of his Matesprit.<p>

"Yeeeeeeees?"

Inside the Heir's room, the scene would seem quite bad. Vriska, the Thief of Light, held John in her grasp by his shirt, pinning him against the wall as he struggled futilely to get out of her grasp. He may have been God Tier, but his physical strength was no match for Vriska's. She always won in these affairs. Always. And right now, it didn't look too good. It looked like they were fighting.

Well, it looked like they were, until one looked closer. With several blue smears on John and a marking on his neck, along with the realization that Vriska was in her fairy costume, it was quite clear what was really going on.

"I-I really don't think we s-should be doing this I mean-" John was cut off by a blue nailed finger being pressed to his lips, Vriska softly shushing him. Vriska could only stare into his eyes. His blue, terrified, aroused eyes. She found it adorable. John himself was completely red. She had tried things like this before, and it always turned him into a stammering wreck.

"Trust me." Vriska whispered before leaning in for a kiss, their glasses clacking together. As she pulled away, all John could voice in response was a whimper.

She grinned, tapping his chin a couple times. "What's wrong, John, nothing to saaaaaaaay?" She enjoyed teasing him, and at first, he could only respond in flustered gibberish. Realizing that she was waiting for a response, or to see what he could even say, he tried to regain his composure.

"Well, it's just that I'm _fairy_ sure that I'm rather nervous about this." John tried to use humor to salvage his nerves, chuckling in a nervous manner. In response, Vriska slammed him back into the wall, eliciting a yelp.

"No puns." She frowned at him. Leave it to John Egbert to start dropping puns during foreplay; it could be a total mood killer. John meekly nodded in response.

Vriska leaned back in, giving the melting John another kiss. Her hands traveled downwards, enjoying the shape of his body before stopping at the hem of his shirt. Her fingers curled around the fabric, ready to pull it up. She was finally going to turn John into a man.

Or at least she would've, if something gooey didn't slam into the back of her head. Immediately, everything stopped as she let out a shriek. "What the _fuck!_" Vriska swore as a hand reached behind her, only to touch metal and goop.

John must've found this hilarious though, as he was able to quickly get a hold of himself, and he started laughing. "Oh this is funny!" Vriska yelled at him. John only pointed behind her.

Oh. _She_ must've caught them. Again.

Vriska turned around to see on the other side of the room, a light blue being, with one arm and a harlequin's hat. Yeah, she found them. Dammit.

"Hi Nanna!" John called out as he waved emphatically. This always happened. Whenever Vriska was about to finally bed her Matesprit, his nanna would always catch them at the last second and intrude on it. Or did she watch and just wait for things to get too heated before stepping in? That was pretty twisted of her if she did.

"She got you good, Vriska." He grinned. Nanna had hit her in the back of the head with one of her pies. Vriska had once told John that she planned to get her back one day. He didn't even get mad, he just laughed and told her it was impossible, and that not even he could outprank her. That was saying something, John was the best there was.

Nannasprite immediately followed this up by calling an oven to her side. The door opened, and a barrage of cookies came flying at both John and Vriska. Vriska simply held up her hands. They were just cookies; it was a nuisance at best. John however, took it differently.

"It _burns _us!" He called out in a rather twisted and hoarse voice, sprinting to the door faster than Vriska thought he could run. In an instant, he was out the door and gone. Nannasprite had ruined yet another chance. And Vriska Serket was not happy about it. She sent the sprite a glare, and Nanna did nothing to respond, only keeping a sweet, grandmotherly smile on her face, calling off the ghastly, baked goods shooting oven.

"What is your problem?" Vriska wiped the pie off. She would have to shower later. But for now, she wanted answers, why she kept doing this.

She got none.

"Everytime, you always come in and wreck everything, why!" Vriska interrogated. She knew she was probably acting like a spoiled brat right now. She didn't care.

And Nannasprite still did nothing.

Vriska's brow furrowed. "I think I get it now." She was pissed; she knew she was being immature. Again, she didn't care. What made it worse was that this sprite was actually ignoring her, taking everything she said and just chucking it off somewhere. "It's because I'm an alien, isn't it? Too old fashioned? Is it too much to see your grandson with an alien?" She wanted to strike a chord, to get the sprite to respond to her at least. This one would at least work.

Nanna's grandmotherly smile evaporated. "That's not it at all." Vriska went silent for a moment. She was so used to Nannasprite ignoring her that it was actually really surprising when she did say something.

"If anything, I applaud it. I've always believed that my grandson deserved someone out of this world." She added on a little "Hoo hoo hoo" at the end, clearly having enjoyed her own little joke, her smile returning.

Vriska would admit she was much better with the puns than John could ever hope to be. "Why are you always butting in when you're not wanted then?" Vriska tried to uphold her temper. Nanna however, had done a really good job with that last pun. She found it fairly funny. Nanna's smile only seemed to brighten.

"Because he's not ready." She answered very simply.

"What do you mean by not ready?" Vriska deadpanned.

"He's not ready for you to take things that far just yet." Nanna explained. Humans worked differently than trolls, and sometimes, just sometimes, Vriska would have a tendency to forget that. Well, perhaps it wasn't sometimes, so much as it was actually something that ended up happening quite often. Vriska rolled her eyes at this answer though.

"When will he 'be ready' then?" Vriska graced the air with quotation marks. She found this to be stupid. She wanted to spend time with her Matesprit, she wanted to take him for herself. She considered Nannasprite's objections to be rather pointless. She figured she could just try again at another time. But she supposed that if she did, then the sprite would just be there to stop her.

"Hoo hoo hoo." Nanna started chuckling. Vriska really hated it when she actually started laughing. It was bearable the first time she met John's nanna, but after that it quickly became rather intolerable. John had even admitted to her that he found that laugh to be rather grating on his nerves. "When he's married, of course."

Married? What was married? Vriska really didn't know anything about this married business. And Nanna took that as her chance, or maybe she just felt that she had something else to do, because she just floated away, phasing through the wall and into another part of the warship, leaving Vriska alone with her thoughts. John probably wouldn't be back in his room for a little while either.

When Vriska did finally notice Nanna was gone, she was annoyed that the sprite had just left her high and dry when she probably could've used an answer on this sort of thing. If it was a human thing though, then perhaps John could be of some assistance. That was right; he would probably have some answers to what Nanna had presented before the Thief of Light. She should probably go track him down anyway, lest he get himself into any more trouble.

Though she still had to deal with the gunk in her hair.

She had had worse before, but it was still annoying. And thankfully John's room did have a shower. She supposed that seeing as he wouldn't be back for a while, she could go clean herself up. Once she had done that, then she could go track down John and get some answers out of him. But she really couldn't do that in the mess she was in, now could she?

Making her way over to John's shower, she shut the door and prepared to clean herself off. She wouldn't trouble herself with what Nannasprite had said just yet. She'd do that once she got her answers.


End file.
